Feeling Lost

I am most definitely a creature of habit. I like my routines and I do not adapt easily to change.

My morning routine used to consist of: wakeup, workout, coffee, quiet time, breakfast.

Now my morning routine is something like: wakeup, workout, coffee, breakfast, do random chores.

See what’s missing?

I used to have quiet time with God every single day. What all started with me skipping one day with Him in the mornings, turned into me missing a week, which turned into me missing 2 months.

Here lately I have been filling some sort of hole in my heart and a sadness washes over me. At first, I couldn’t quite place where the sadness was coming from.

These past couple weeks I have been feeling somewhat afraid of where my future is leading me. I’ve been stressing about school coming up, the classes I’m taking now, and even picking apart my relationship with Barrett.

I’ve been feeling lost.

Barrett and I were talking about all this last night and he asked me, “Have you been praying lately?” I immediately said yes but then I thought, “well I mean, not really, not like I should be.”

I hadn’t realized until last night just how much I needed that quiet time with God in the mornings. I needed to pray to Him, ask Him to guide me throughout my day, ask Him to guide my relationship with Barrett. But these last 2 months I have done everything but those things.

I got so caught up in trying to get everything done in the morning, I forgot that I can still get everything done while also putting God first. And if I miss loading the dishwasher in the morning or making my bed, those things can always wait, time with Him cannot.

I need God like I need air or water or peanut butter.

I’m tired of feeling lost and I know only God can pull me out of this hole I have dug for  myself.

So here’s to getting back in my routine and holding His hand along the way.

Happy Wednesday Friends!